I basically hit the lottery when I married Katie. Her parents are some of the coolest people I know. Not only were they cool with me dating their daughter, but they also were cool with me (and my creepy van with no windows) asking her hand in marriage. Mark and Laura are amazing people who do a lot in their community. It's an honor that they came all this way. There's no chance they were going to leave Africa without going on an adventure with their favorite son in-law. The only thing I asked them was if they were planning on bringing shoes. :) The first step on our journey was down to the Wilderness Beach and then over to the mountain. Follow the decommissioned train track (RIP Choo Choo) and over a few, kinda skinny trails. Like I said, these guys are champs. And, it's not their first rodeo. This is where having shoes came in handy. Laura leading the way!! Once you leave the train tunnel, you get to a large cave where a man has built a house inside and has spent almost a decade taking in homeless people who need a place to stay. If a cave on the side of a cliff is your bag of tea then this is the place for you. The man is nice. Last time we paid him a visit it was 2014. He is a little religious, but not over zealous! He is genuine and the cave man really doesn't say much, which makes you wonder if he leans more towards bat shit crazy (no pun intended) or genius??? Once you leave the cave house you can hang a Louie and continue down the train tracks. Just past the cave is a beautiful bridge that crosses over the Kaaimans River. This is a magnificent river, but the bridge is dodgey. I didn't see the "don't walk" sign. So, I ventured out juuust a little bit on the bridge. That was until I realized that each step I took was one step closer to death or tetanus. I did an about face and walked my ass right back to safety. Walking on this bridge was batshit crazy. Do not walk on that bridge. I love this last picture. My father in-law a badass. A straight up honey badger. On a side note.
Don't believe the hype. I've spent (almost) years in Africa and never once felt danger. In America however, I have been in public places three times where a gun was being shot in an irresponsible way. I suppose it's just what you see... Or, maybe not. There are some things that I will never forget. Like the day I witnessed my mom meet the Indian Ocean for the first time. The Indian Ocean is the Grandmother to us. She is ancient and soft yet she is fierce. She is mystical and enchanting. Mom and I were completely blissed out. Walking along the shoreline felt like we were floating. No drugs, just the present moment. Plus, all the moments that brought us to this moment right now. I called out to mom that we need to take a selfie. As I press the shutter on the camera, I drop it and as it goes tumbling down towards the water, my cat-like reflexes kick in and I caught the GoPro mid air, as it was taking a ten second "burst" of pictures. These were the two gems of that series. We were more excited that I actually caught the camera before it fell into the ocean. A lesson on presence over presents. :) Indian Ocean sunsets are pretty spectacular. This sunset will forever be etched into my memory. I already wish I could go back in time and re-live it again. My mom and her husband Chris had to leave for the airport the following morning, so we knew we had to go back to see the Grandmother, the Indian Ocean, one last time. What an amazing trip. Katie and I would have never guessed that our families would come all the way out to Africa to come meet our daughter Rayah. The whole experience has been a highlight of my life.
Katie and I started traveling/working/living in Africa back in 2010. It took us a while to justify going to the game parks. We used to travel on a such a shoe string budget that going to a game park wasn't something we could afford - and, in all honesty, we didn't want to acknowledge our privilege back then. In 2014 we went to Kruger National Park in South Africa. Kruger is one of the gems of this world. Seeing these magnificent animals and the conservation corps that keep the African animals alive totally changed our minds. Going on safari is a must. . We were bummed that Kruger was such a long way away from where our parents were. It took some research to find which game parks are (the most) ethical. We settled on Botlierskop Private Game Reserve on the Garden Route. Which was AWESOME. Check out this wild animal getting a diaper change in the middle of safari. 3 weeks old. No big deal. Since Rayah was so young, we had to rent a private tour. Which was even better in my opinion. Our guide was very knowledgeable and passionate. It's always nice to be in the company of someone who is passionate about their work. It's not a bad day at the office. [Meow]. It is such a privilege to experience a safari. A privilege to experience life, so rare, it has to be protected. Our way of life is encroaching on others, both human and non human relatives.
When I was invited to Sweat at Standing Rock, the Elder who lead the Prayerful Ceremony taught us as he beat the drum. "When you pray, you pray for all of Creation. Everything Creator Created. From the Ant to the Elephant. All is Sacred." I feel their Spirit. It's the same One inside me. We were Created by the same Creator and it is up to me to be a good steward and live in Harmony with Creation. Learn from them. Study and meditate and pray for them. For we are all one. Katie and I are basically moving in and out of AirBnb's in whatever country we're in. Off the top of my head, I think we have stayed in an AirBnb in at least 10 different countries around the world. South Africa has some of the best AirBnb's. Not only are they in some of the most beautiful places we've seen, but we are also very privileged to have US Dollars - which makes a place like this AirBnb farmhouse for $34/night a very good value. $34/night and the inside was very nice. It was decorated in the Midwestern suburb motif. You know - grays on grays on pastels mixed with some recycled wood, and, like 30 pillows. I felt like I was back home. It was nice. Very comfortable and the family was super friendly. Just think about the kind of motel you would get for $34/night back in the USA... It certainly wouldn't have a view like this every morning. To the east you have the big beautiful mountains and the south and west you have the Indian Ocean. 360 views. Plus this AirBnb came with a farm dog. Her name is Lola. And she is the sweetest. Any time she would hear Rayah cry she would come running over from the next house over and stick her head in the back door to check on her. It was crazy. If Rayah would cry for an extended time, the dog Lola would walk inside the house and lick me or Katie or Rayah. We could tell she was genuinely concerned if Rayah was upset. Eventually Lola just slept on the back porch. All these pictures were taken at 6am. I've been getting up everyday at sunrise. This one day in particular I had to get Katie and Rayah out of bed. The sun just started peaking out from the distant mountain cloud cover. The green rolling hills showed the dramatic depth between the mountains and the sea. Rising up from the second rolling green pasture was a blanket of fog coming up from the Groot Brak River. Afrikaans for "Great Brackish (salty-ish) River. All the pictures above are sunrise. All the pictures below are sunset. Which, sunsets are usually accompanied with a walkabout. We have to get a lay of the land. Helping us understand where we are by observing the four directions and how they connect us to our relations.
My mom, her husband Chris and Katie's parents traveled all the way from USA to come meet their Granddaughter. I think they each traveled over 30 hours each way to make it happen. It's not a small feat by any means. I know my mom would have traveled to the moon to meet her first granddaughter. I am so grateful that my mom gets to be a Grandmother. She is the strongest woman I know, wise beyond her years. She traveled all the way out here to The Motherland. It's a symbolic right of passage entering Grandparent-hood. The beginning of the end of the Cycle. Watching my mother hold her my daughter for the first time is something I will never forget. Katie's parents came out too. Which I am proud to admit that I feel like the luckiest man alive for marrying into Katie's family. Not only are her parents but all her sisters and aunts and uncles on both sides are some of the best people I know. Katie comes from a big beautiful family, just like my family. So naturally, everybody gets along very well and this trip has been an experience I will take with me for the rest of my life. Our parents were super sweet. They all said that they were happy to just sit around and be with the baby. I told them that if they came all the way out to South Africa then I have to go show them a few things. Thankfully we come from families who are always down for an adventure. You would never know that my mom had triple bypass, open heart surgery 12 months ago. We never, ever, could have dreamed we would all be walking these beaches a year after standing in that hospital in Clearwater, Florida. Our parents rented an AirBnb just down the hill from our place in Scarborough. We spent the first few days just hanging out around this beautiful little mountain beach village. Scarborough is just a little south of Cape Town. There are (maybe) 250 full time residents. Scarborough is very beautiful. Once you leave the town, in either direction, the views get pretty epic. Here are a few pics of Katie's parents taking in the scenery. It didn't take long for them to see why we came out here to have our baby. Our parents spent two weeks with us out here. I wish it could have been longer. We did our best to balance between resting and adventuring. A lot of times Katie would stay back with the baby and rest/heal. Which is tough, because if there is anyone who is ready for an adventure it is Katie. Thankfully there are a lot of quick day trips right down the road from us. Below is a picture I took of Simons Town. It is the next town over from where we live (which is still part of Cape Town). Right next to the military base is Boulders Beach, that's where the penguins live. I'm not sure about you, but I love penguins. They are one of my favorite animals. I mean, who doesn't love penguins? I know the South African Navy loves penguins because they built their base so close they're practically neighbors. Who wouldn't want penguins as neighbors? The only other place I've ever seen wild penguins is New Zealand.
Penguins for the win. More blogs coming soon!! Check back often. Love, Brian Katie and I are so grateful for the time we have taken to go through this process. We knew at the beginning of 2018 that we needed to take a minimum of three months off during the end of 2018 and beginning of 2019. The physical demands of touring full time (multiplied by 11 years makes your body feel at least 10 years older. When we found out that Katie was pregnant we immediately (and unanimously) decided that 3 months needed to actually be 5 months. 5 months seemed the most natural to us. It is what our collective mind and body have been saying for years. Our Spirit also let us know we need to take this time for ourselves, for our baby, for our family and our career(s). The culture from which we come from however says the opposite. The idea that a mom and dad would take anything more than a week or two away from the hampster wheel is ridiculous. Right? My job can feel like a hampser wheel too sometimes. I'm not calling anyone out in particular. Where I'm from, the second question a lot of people ask a stranger (after what is your name) is "what do you do?" What do you do... as in what do you do for work and/or how do you make money?? We are conditioned to work but are we Created to grind? Are we Created to make a corporation as much money as possible? Or in my case, am I Created to grind 175 shows a year... I could do 300 if I wanted... and make as much as possible for the family... Am I created to do that? At what cost? How much of my today to I give up for (the hope of) tomorrow? I have felt both ways. Am I or am I not defined by what I do (or don't do) to make money... And, is my worth or identity connected to it? If so, how much. These are things I think about. Taking four and half months to learn how to be a family was the best thing we could have ever done. If there was one thing we could have done better - it would have been to take more time. Like 6, 7 or 8 months. Developing this bond between all three of us is priceless. No amount of money could be more important then all the time(s) we get to hold her in our arms. We get to build this trust with one another. When she cries (which isn't a lot) she self comforts or finds comfort in either Katie or myself. That is trust. And that trust is sacred to us. 5 months of maternity and paternity leave has been vital to the foundation of our family. I can't believe (actually, I can) why our hyper consuming, money worshiping leaders (and talking heads) feel that new mothers and fathers are "lazy" and "entitled" for wanting (or believing) that anything more than a week away from making someone (else) money (after your birth) is a bad thing. A few miles behind where we live (on the backside of the mountain and a few miles up hill) is a neighborhood called the Red Hill Township. Townships (in South Africa) are where the blacks live. The townships are metal shacks with stones weighing down the roofs. Many South Africans say it is dangerous to go in (or around) the townships... Over where we live, in Scarborough, we pick up hichhikers from Red Hill (everyone in South Africa hitchhikes). People stand on the side of the road with money in their hand. A lot of the population does not have a car (let alone the means to save up and buy a car). We pickup hitchhikers every single day when we drive past Red Hill. The people we meet are not dangerous. They are not poor. They dress nicer than Katie and me. They are rich in culture not to mention some of the nicest people we meet. We have picked up some South Africans but mostly refugees from Zimbabwe and other people from Malawi and Namibia. Just some of the most beautiful people you would ever meet with amazing stories. We talk to these people like we do anyone - with respect, dignity and sensitivity. One of the men we picked up was a refugee from Zimbabwe. Katie expressed her sorrow about the violence that caused him to leave his home. He looked at her and said "the media makes it worse than it is and I just have to enjoy my life where I'm at today and make the most of it and I am happy." That's what he said after we dropped him off at the Township. Here I am living this life of privilege.
In my nice rental car coming back from my ocean front AirBnb that I rented for a few months. Going to and from the grocery store at will, without having to climb, walk and/or hitchhike the 15 miles up and down a massive mountain because I will never make enough money in my lifetime to ever buy a car... This refugee from Zimbabwe whom we picked up hitchhiking told us (and showed us) that he is happy. So. Who is rich and who is poor? If you want to be rich, want more or desire less. I have to decide to see, listen, feel, receive, process and never forget the stories of so many people I have met across this continent and around the world. Or, do I decide to not see, not listen, not feel and instead assume, pity and so on?? Or is it both. Am I rich and poor? I'm grateful to perform at the ReForest Festival in the beautiful Platbos Forest. ReForest Festival is put on by Greenpop, which is one of South Africas greenest NGO's in the country. They're green because it is a tree planting festival. Just this year alone they planted over 2000 tree's. I absolutely loved the child talent show. Huge thanks to the parents who are out there encouraging their children to explore their creativity. I am beyond grateful to bring my music to this festival. I am humbled that we have been given the gifts and the stories of so many, We remember. Thank you Greenpop for bringing us back to this amazing festival and thank you to everyone who came out to see my set. It's amazing to see how every year the crowd gets a little bigger. It's a humble reminder when I find myself in the valley to simply trust the process. Another highlight was that our daughter Rayah was 3 weeks old for the event. She was definitely the youngest at the festival. I love holding her. She melts my heart and brings me to center. To the present, and then your name gets called and it's go time... This is a picture of me trying to tell her why I have to put her down to do sound check. |
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September 2023
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